


Stag Wrangling.

by Crowley_Kitten



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, Hotel Sex, Ineffable Kinktober 2020, Lapdance, M/M, Nipples, Sex Worker Positive, Stag Night, Stag Party, Strippers & Strip Clubs, nipple counting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:02:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26824843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crowley_Kitten/pseuds/Crowley_Kitten
Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale successfully manage to get a very drunk Newton Pulsifer back to his hotel bed after his stag night.Aziraphale isn't convinced a stag do is something he wants. Crowley thinks otherwise.prompt. day 4. lapdance.
Relationships: Anathema Device & Newton Pulsifer, Anathema Device/Newton Pulsifer, Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Sergeant Shadwell & Madame Tracy (Good Omens), Sergeant Shadwell/Madame Tracy (Good Omens)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 37
Collections: Ineffable Kinktober 2020, my Ineffable Kinktober





	Stag Wrangling.

Newton Pulsifer staggered down the hotel corridor, held up by the remarkably sober, all things considered, couple from that very strange day in Tadfield. He couldn’t control his feet, and he just wanted to sing.    
  
“Oh, DO be quiet Newt. Other guests are trying to sleep!” Aziraphale fussed   
  
“Got to... got to tell Seargent Shadwell....”    
  
“Tell him what?” Crowley snapped. “I’m sure he knows all about those sort of things by now, I mean his missus is a retired sex worker.”   
  
“Tell him they all.......” He burped, eyes widening as he swallowed hard “Oh dear..... tell him they all had two nipples!....oh.... look... guys, I just want to..... want to say..... thank you for coming with me. I know it’s not really your thing is it... you know. Ladies?”   
  
“Come on Newt. We'll get you to bed. Best get you sobered up a bit too first”   
  
“Now, hang on a minute, Angel, he EARNED that hangover!”    
  
“Yes, but we don’t want him passed out and vomiting. I’ll leave him sober enough to sleep safely” Crowley slid the keycard into the lock, and opened the door. “Come on young man. Bedtime." Newt stumbled taking off his shoes, and tripped over his trousers as he tried to kick them off. Aziraphale got him into bed, removing some of the alcohol from his system. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow. Crowley placed the keycard on the bedside table and Aziraphale fetched a large glass of water, putting it in easy reach.    
  
“I promised Anathema I’d text her to let her know we got him back in one piece.” Muttered Crowley, jabbing at his phone rapidly. He sent the message, and there was soon an answering beep. “Right. Stag herding duties complete. Back to our room it is.” Aziraphale picked up Newts trousers, folded them neatly on the chair, made sure his wallet was on the desk, and his phone was charging.    
  
Their room was just over the hall, so after a final check, they left Newt to sleep it off. Aziraphale took up his toiletries and prepared for bed. When he was clean and in his pyjamas, he left the bathroom.    
  
“You know, my dear, I’m really not certain I would want a stag party. It does all seem rather chaotic and undignified” 

“Oh I don’t know. Quite a good laugh, really. You telling me you wouldn’t want a lap dance?”   
  
“Don’t be silly, you know I’m not really.... into that. Don't get me wrong, those ladies were very impressive. Must take a lot of core strength, some of those pole moves. They must be very fit and strong. I can appreciate the artistry of it, it’s just not.... my thing, as well you know” Crowley spun a chair, sitting astride it in a swift movement, his forearms resting on the back, looking up through his coppery lashes at his prim little Angel.    
  
“I think I could make you enjoy it”    
  
“What on Earth are you on about dear?” Crowley held out a hand invitingly. “OH!”. Aziraphale said softly, taking it. Rising to his feet, Crowley led the Angel and seated him in the chair. He pressed his lips to the inside of his soft wrist.    
  
“No Touching” He whispered. With a smirk he scrolled through his phone, picking a track. “Now......” His thumb hovered over The Velvet Underground, Venus in Furs. “I think this calls for some ….as you would call it, bebop.” As the mysterious, riff began, he flung his phone onto the bed and snapped his fingers. He turned away, stalking across the room, his hips at full sway, aided by the tall stilettoes he had called into existence. Aziraphale swallowed hard, his eyes immediately drawn to that intoxicatingly perfect arse. Looking coquettishly over his shoulder he unfastened his jacket, shimmied it down exposing the well-tailored shirt, barely disguising the lean musculature beneath. He let the jacket fall, turning back, running his tongue slowly along his lower lip. His head thrown back, Crowley nested his fingers in his short red hair, shaking out shoulder-length curls. He knew Aziraphale preferred his hair at least this long, or longer still. But at this length, it wouldn’t obscure his torso in any way.

Aziraphale's mouth hung softly open. His breathing rasping heavily at the sight before him. Slowly the demon played with his nipples through the silk of his shirt, raising the high little peaks so they were clearly visible even at this distance. Crowley turned away again, skimming his hands down the front of his thighs until he grasped his own ankles. He made some rolling motions, meeting his Angels gaze through the arch of his legs. Aziraphale's hands rapidly went to his lap, folding neatly together there, to hide the straining tent in his pyjamas. Crowley let his tongue dart out, lapping at his own ankle.    
and then... oh...his spine was so flexible that as he straightened his body, his long, agile tongue traced up the inseam of his calves, until a little beyond his knees. The Angel was wide-eyed at the display of agility. Crowley spun back around on his heel, strutting back to the chair, straddling his angels inviting lap. Aziraphale reached up to stroke at that lean chest, only to have his hands pushed away.    
  
“No touching.” Crowley repeated, before slowly, eyes locked on the blue grey depths, he began to unbutton his shirt, opening it to reveal his bullet hard, sensitive, rose pink nipples. Ducking his head, his tongue trailed lightly over first one, then the other. The Angel was SO hard beneath him. He didn’t feel it was fair to torment him much longer, but ground down on that bulge to see those eyelids flutter, to hear his soft, delighted whimper.    
  
“SO, my beloved Angel..... you see a lap dance can be quite....the stimulating.....experience.” Crowley panted heavily into his Angels ear. Aziraphale growled low in his throat, before flinging Crowley to their shared bed, on him in a panting mess of greedy, grabbing limbs, heaving lungs, and fingers that tugged his tight jeans down to have him. Moaning hungrily into the nape of the demons neck as he readied him for that delightfully heavy, thick cock of his. 


End file.
